The word compare means to liken to, estimate, measure or point the similarities or dissimilarities between.
We're constantly searching for, analysing and calibrating what we have with what we percieve as someone else posessing.
Apparently, if you are satisfied and content with what is yours, you do not aim for that higher goal.
Whenever I hear such arguments, it simply wears me down, depresses me. Contentment is an easy road for me, don't really need much to warm this soul but then the external forces that try to drive a wedge into this sublimity aren't easy to subdue.
Comparisns are something we have in our DNA I guess. I've noticed that even little children who arent taught this unwelcome trait, have it innately within them and covet the toy or bauble other children have and display desperation to acquire them.
Like I always say, as we grow into adulthood, we are able to mask these feelings behind sophistication and guile but the inherent and elemental in us cannot squelch and vanquish these innervations. Comparisns are two fold, one that we ourselves endorse with our own person and those that we involve others in from children to friends, spouses to neighbors.
It is the most lowdown thing to revel in, measure the precious relationships and people in your life to someone else. It is very demeaning and de motivating to everyone involved, including ourselves. The minute I have negatively compared my child with another, I have delivered a severe blow to the child's own self confidence and maimed him in ways that are not apparent immediately.
When I have weighed my friends strengths or my spouses weakness with someone else and have been critical of it, I have inadvertently conveyed my contempt and this cannot help anyone, especially myself. It's a double edged sword, while I have used it, with whatever intentions ( I have heard that when you compare you give the person a goal, a hero to live up to and emulate... sic!) not only do I damage the other person's confidence and psyche, I also jeopardise my own relationship.
Relationships are precious and need to be nurtured, they are fragile and need nourishment. The word compare has the 'pare' in it. Pare means to reduce, prune, trim, slash and scrape among other synonymous meanings.
I know in my naivete I probably have been guilty of all of the above and I sincerely apologise for being insensitive and stupid. But I also promise that I will never lessen the value of any relationship by ever likening it with another.
Each being unique, special and complete in itself.
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