Hype Oh Crite...

Hypocrisy is considered by some to be the eighth cardinal sin of man. Being consistently evil is in some ways better than being inconsistently nice. Inconsistency is thought to be the hallmark of a man of weak character, of one who cannot decisively control his own actions - Mendel Adelman.

I confess I'm hypocritical too, a trait I'm trying my best to minimize.

The current been in the bonnet is the poor unsuspecting ‘bindi’, if I'd known it would cause so much trouble, I'd have tattooed one on my forehead by now. Bindi is a coloured dot worn on the centre of the forehead, originally by Hindus and Jains. Bindu is considered the point at which creation begins and may become unity. It is also described as ‘the scared symbol of the cosmos in its unmanifested state’ - Wikipedia.

When one of the girls who married into my family said she loves my bindi’s and used to wear them before she got married, I asked her what stops you now and she said ‘I’m not allowed to wear’. ALLOWED??? Seriously!!!! By who exactly and the poor girl mumbled something incoherently.

When I narrated this to someone in the family, she says, “I hope you didn’t encourage her”.

I was ‘reminded’ that Protestant Christian women from my family and church in Mangalore do not and should not wear bindi’s as it is against our culture. Now that I am defying the traditions that I was so carefully brought up with, I should be mindful that I maybe encouraging other women in my family to follow suit and this is a cardinal sin (oh we have an entire glossary of sins that yours truly indulges in freely, if excommunication was allowed I’d be first in line for my ‘misdeeds’).

Twenty five blood vessels burst in my head simultaneously and before I could explode I was told, “You married out of the community so we don’t tell you anything but don’t encourage our girls to wear it, if her husband doesn’t like it, she shouldn’t”.

I’m astounded I’m still alive, really. The pressure in my cranium was immense and I asked the woman in question, “how can you even say that? Did you not tell me a week ago that you are not allowed to do the little things you like since your husband doesn’t ‘allow’ it? And did amnesia make its way into your being so quick… talk about double standards.”

Needless to say, our relationship is strained thinner than gossamer strings. I’m only lamenting on the many experiences we are shut ourselves from because of our hypocritical attitude. Women cry foul about subjugation when its themselves they are talking about but when its other women, especially younger women, ‘culture’ and ‘tradition’ are used like Damocles sword and chastity belts to reign them in.

We do not need anyone to clip our wings and shackle us, we do so ourselves dear fair sex, quit then the needless whining about 'equality', it's never going to adorn the portals of your abode as long as you are Janus faced.

When you say you're done with servility and would like some civility, can you please sit down, shut the f*ck up and practice consistency in speech and actions.

Oh come off it… hippo critters!